I love symmetry. And bookends. And finishing where you started.
So here I am today, returning to the blog that I’ve neglected for two years but that was always present in the back of my head for the last decade, whenever a thought struck me and I would make that familiar-but-usually-empty promise: “I should write a blog post about that.”
This is my 125th–and final–post on this blog. But don’t let the math fool you. Would that I have written 12.5 posts each year! Like Sammy Sosa’s home run totals in 1998, the number of posts inflated unnaturally in 2015, becoming worthy of a permanent asterisk as this blog about my 30s swiftly transformed into a blog about my cancer experiences and post-treatment ruminations. I started having kids and started a new dad blog, and good ole Rounding 30 rarely got my attention. Perhaps it’s the greatest parenting metaphor of all that the blog about me and my thoughts and opinions took an instant backseat to a blog about my kids…
In the interests of symmetry, however, I want to finish where I started, and I feel compelled to make this post somehow sum something up about the last decade of my life. What have I learned? How have I grown? What will I take with me on the journey to 50? And what kind of hellish sentence is that?!
While age is just a number, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to believe that those “numbers” between 30 and 50 are a defining era in a person’s life. Being smack dab in the middle of most life expectancies, the way in which these years are spent says a lot about your life’s purpose and priorities.
For me, my 30s were about making good–by the grace of God–on the lofty dreams I had for my life. As these dreams have come to fruition, I’ve spent many moments taking the blessings of my reality for granted and too few moments basking in the glow of the unearned majesty of the last 10 years’ developments.
So my hope is to spend the next decade being more present in the present of my present.
Wordplay aside, I want to be intentional about how I’m spending my time. I want to be grateful for–and a good steward of–the blessings of my family, my friends, my health, and other areas of my life that are not a perpetual given. I want to spend more time in prayer and less time on social media. I want to spend more time attuned to the people that I am surrounded by and less time on autopilot, buzzing through one thing to get to the next thing.
If I am blessed with the longevity to repeat what’s behind me, I’d love for the next four decades to be more vibrant. I’m not sure I can define that word in this context for you, but I know what I mean by it and that’s all that really matters. Unlike the first time around, I’m starting the second half with the myriad gifts of adulthood: experience, scar tissue, knowledge, regrets, accomplishments, habits, successes, failures, confidence, faith, morality, and more.
There will always be excuses, but I know more now at 40 about what I have to put into my life in order to get out the best possible results. And I’m excited to keep trying…and learning.
My 30s were incredible, but halftime is over. Let’s go.